It's so hard figuring out exactly when I'm situated lately.... I don't know how much of that sense of being untethered not anchored in time is the quality of the fatelines being in such turmoil flux (they only get more chaotic before they calm down again) and how much of it is me having to be so regimented to get all my hours in around the chaos of so many days/hours commited to Irishfests and shows and needing to back and froth between my parents and FINALLY having a chance to settle into some introvert recharge time (though I have a lot of adulting appointments and things I need to do...)  Somewhere around Oct 2023 I started writing the date correctly but the year as 2025 on everything and it took me until like February or so to get my head back into the correct year to date things. So there's that as well. I keep referring to things that haven't happened yet in real time as things already done or things already in motion and confusing people. So I've just been a bit quieter and in my head far away again. Also, during the eclipse on my birthday, I was sleeping during the actual time of it and had a very interesting dream with all the angels I know well have worked with (Gabriel, Raphael, Michael, Metatron, Sandalphon) were with me at like a war table and Raphael told me, "World War Three ends in six weeks." but I don't know if it's six weeks from my ACTUAL now of the eclipse or six weeks from the moment they took me to that we were witnessing and when I asked for clarification I was told again, "World war Three ends in six weeks."  Not entirely certain if they mean the current world war by proxies or an escalation of it or the war for souls/hunt for the nephilim that are on this planet and shouldn't be... I also don't know six weeks from WHEN the now is that it will be six weeks until the end. Message just came through on the eclipse to me.  Six weeks from the dream is a week after the US elections AND it's right about when Pluto enters Aquarius for the final "for keeps" and won't be back into Capricorn for another 200+ years -- but I don't know if that has anything to do with when the six weeks time frame refers to. For what it's worth, the only person at the table I recognized from any sort of geopolitical context as a national/international leader was the emperor of Japan who was a non-voting member of the Japanese seat though obviously I recognized flags that were there at the table..... So we may still be in war by proxies and still another four year cycle or more out from when the third world war ends... I don't know... I'll recognize those seated at the table when I see it, but that's all I have on it.

Also, as of last week, Spock OFFICIALLY has a feline CKD diagnosis and needs to be put on a renal health diet. He won't be staged until he gets his next blood draw and urinalysis a month after I switch his food out. (Which means I still have to go pickup food for him.) I won't know until after we know what stage of feline Chronic Kidney Disease how long to expect he still has with me. Other than drinking more water and losing weight (he lost 1.1 lbs over the last year since his previous vet visit and 1.1lbs the visit before) and not eating as much, he's not really showing symptoms. He's an elderly cat (15.5 years old) so he sleeps a lot which makes it hard to say if it's more or less lethargy than he should for his age. I'll know more with his followup bloodwork but I don't know yet.  But it means that there is a soon to be known finite limit on the time remaining to come see my George Winston loving cat and gift him one of the greatest joys of his already 15.5 year long lifetime by sitting down to the piano and playing for him in person.

That's all I have to catch up on right now. I feel like I should write more, but I don't really have more to say here right now. Mostly I've been enjoying my hermitting time with my fur babies recently tbh, I've also had a lot of solar flare migraines recently with all the flares (but also all the gorgeous aurora dancing over us here all across Wisconsin!) x and m class flares when the fastest moving particles hit the earth (not the cme, the first wave from it) tend to make me lightheaded and I get crackly lightning like auras when I move but not as much pain or instant dry heaving as with some of my other migraine triggers. I'm looking forward to fall days cool crisp and reading books and maybe soon laying the first fire in the hearth for this fall/winter season! 

Knock on wood, haven't had the "get out now flee while you can" response so far to Milton, we'll see if tomorrow night is similar. Maybe it was just with Helene and the flooding/mudslides and where they were that was having me react that way. But also, even though I intellectually knew how destructive Helee would be and had already been processing for weeks the images from the precogs of the devastation across the Appalachias and the damage of water and wind along the gulf coast (reminder: when I have immutable precog flashes that nothing can alter and no act of human free will can change the fate from unfolding exactly as I saw it, I tend to keep those to myself and process them out of sync with how most people process society level tragedies. I only play Cassandra and say the hard things out loud when they're still mutable precogs, when there's still even the smallest sliver of time for free will to step in and change a person's fate from tragedy to a bright(er) future. But the immutable precogs, those I just have to see and bear witness and grieve out of sync with how everyone else processes society or group/familial level tragedies in real time...And that includes when I precog deaths of people or relationships I have loved dearly -- when I know "this is the last time we will ever experience this together again and I'm going to miss you so much but I can't let the grief steal this last joy even though I already know and you don't yet."  Just because I'm already grieving over what will be and can't be changed no matter how damn hard it's fought doesn't mean I have to destroy the beauty and joy of the memory making perfect farewell for the other person who doesn't ye know. But also, if there's any chance remaining whatsoever it's still a mutable precog and free will could still avert that fate, I will fight tooth and nail to try to keep those opportunities open or give advice that makes me sound crazy to make sure you do/don't do what will make the path inevitable.... If I tell you free will choice can change the path I see that has my emotions all in turmoil, it's still mutable and you still have time -- when I go silent and emo and stoic and STOP telling you that you can still fix things and choose a different path, it means you missed the last fork in the road that could have opened a different future to you and are now on an inevitable immutable fateline where neither you nor I nor anyone else can save you from the path I foresaw tried to steer you away from choosing... But as long as the penny's in the air, it's still a fate that can be changed -- and if I'm willing to talk about it at all, your free will choices can still carve a different path for you than the one I saw you on if you take no action to change course.) Maybe whoever it is connected to me isn't in the path of this destructive force -- or maybe it's just not yet close enough to be hitting me the gut punch instinctual "flee before you can't" panic over a natural disaster too big. I don't feel any mounting panic over this massive hurricane so soon after the last, though I've seen the precogs of what's coming and it's bad...but it's not the instinctive existential "GET THE FUCK OUT NOW OR YOU WON'T SURVIVE THE FORCE OF NATURE BEARING DOWN ON YOU!!!" visceral panic. Nothing like that in me -- just a desire to curl up and hermit away from the world with what brings me joy and peace and hygge for the warm fuzzy cozy veil is thinning spooky season things in my life. 

Je ne sais pas. On verra. If I instinctual panic again like that, if anyone knows I'm sure writing it here will be the first to know, lol.

But I'm going to enjoy my hermitting while I have it -- I JUST got my SVD (special voting deputy -- it's the thing where you go into permanent care facilities to help with absentee voting; mostly elder care so have to be good and patient with elders) and they scheduled me for Mon 10/14 afternoon and Tues 10/15 afternoon and Fri 10/18 morning. Which means I can now get to work scheduling 1) Waffles annual vet visit and vaccines 2) my personal optometry appointment and purchase of new contacts (thank goodness for eye med now included in my dental insurance!) 3) my overdue oil change and tire rotation (and free alignment check/fix if I schedule at Tires Plus where I got the replacement tires) and 4) Spock's 1 month follow up bloodwork and urinalysis so we can stage his level of CKD.  Also need to pickup more Heartgard/Simparic for the dog AND buy renal support food for the cat AND do a Target run. See what I mean about the adulting piling up on me that I need to schedule and get done? I just needed those svd dates before I scheduled during my availability. Also, FINALLY getting down into 30s overnight next Sun through the following Weds so I'm going to have to harvest and bring in or end the lives of my nightshades and other not frost resilient outdoor summer plant babies. (I already brought inside my myrtle tree and strawberry shamrocks from my balcony at home. Only petunias still outside on my balcony for when I sit outside with my choke cherry tree and bird friends -- haven't yet pulled the table and chairs all the way in against the balcony door to reduce snow/ice damage to the balcony furniture (all of which I picked up secondhand for free anyway.) AND, the reason I had to get a jump on hours this week while waiting for the svd assignments (and hygge-ing it up as much as I could) is because tickets with my parents and bff Crissy for Shipwrecked Saloon at the Masonic Center on Thurs (akin to the Edgar Alan Poe Speakeasy -- actor vignette stories and four themed cocktails), then on Fri night tickets with my parents and bff for Shrek the Musical on tour at overture Hall AND on Sat night Cath Cath (my mum's high school best friend and bonus aunt in my life, the one I go visit whenever I'm in Seattle area visiting my sister's family) is currently back in Madison visiting her family and that's her annual party since she won't be back at Christmas time when she traditionally held it.

And THAT is why I've spent this first start of October being at home reading and listening to piano music and drinking coffee/tea/whiskey and just snuggling into the hygge and cozy joys before my life starts up the crazy again.