It's not that I don't ever play dice with death and Texas hold em with the Fates - I have plenty of stupid life threatening driving choices amongst my "I should be dead" stories I've made in this life. I have more I should be dead stories than anyone else I know and far more than anyone who loves me should be comfortable about. For most people's sanity, it's best I don't talk about them. Plenty of them are miracles, not just minor ones, that I'm still alive -- and that does not include times where I personally intervened used my gifts to avoid dying yet.  Frankly, you should not take for granted any future moments with me given how many "I should be dead" stories I have - I've already lived longer this life than I have in many centuries of short lives and I personally know all of this is already on borrowed time bonus round of my reward life.  The paths that see me reach old age this life are narrow and few, but they do exist. They just depend on choices, some of which aren't mine to make. Beyond whether or not I decide to play another hand with the Fates and hope I get a good hand on the river.

When it comes to stupid choices I have made to play dice with death around driving, I am guilty of the following (some as multiple occasions): High speeds in excess of 120mph, including going over 130mph in pouring rain, driving in deep snow and whiteout blizzards that upon hitting a patch of slush have required a friendly guy with a plough truck to pull me out of the ditch past the shoulder, spinning out on black ice roads and having to bend space and time so as not to crash through another car or into the barrier, deciding to off-road the Prius up a muddy hill that trucks couldn't get over and van bands were braking trailer axles at the festival grounds, broadside high winds that have nearly caused the vehicle to roll over and made other drivers fail at lane positions.... And other driving situations that weren't weather related stupid, just wrong place wrong time with other drivers. But with the risky weather driving choices, some of those times I had reasons I thought were worth the risks and some of them were me running on sheer stubbornness not stopping to think. It's not a lack of courage, it's a deep respect for winter weather conditions based on a thorough knowledge of how treacherous winter weather can be. Especially extreme cold and ice. There are potentially deadly choices only southerners and Californians would ever make in winter -- people accustomed to living in winter just shake their heads wonder, "why the fuck would you think that a good idea?!" And I live where people cut holes in deep water lakes to sit in shanties drinking beer and hoping a fish will bite for fun. And when not sledding and man made hockey rinks at every park and skiing and snowshoeing and ice skating on frozen lakes/ponds and snowmobiling and climbing frozen waterfalls for fun, ice fishing is legitimately something people look forward to here. Yes you play in the snow and the cold and roads were cleared so snowmobile trails at state parks were opened by 2pm after the 4.5-6 inches of snow we got Saturday night - but you also avoid dangerous drives hunker down in respect and don't do unnecessarily stupid things when there's heavy snow, black ice, raw temps below -10F, or windchills below -25F. And in winter time, in addition to my normal first aid kit, Maglite, tire pressure gauge, spare tire with jack, and battery jumping pack, I also keep snow shovel, extra snow boots, cat litter (as grit in case the car gets stuck), extra blankets, extra gloves/hats, and often hand warmer packets. Just in case.  

You can make reckless life choices if you feel you must or you're just in a state of damned cussedness about things, but you go prepared for dealing with potential consequences and you never lie to yourself about your worst case scenarios along the route you'll be taking. And in general, unless it's something that you are willing to potentially die for or be the reason some innocent other person dies because of your choice, you don't ever play "fuck around and find out" when there's black ice and/or raw temperatures below 0F. Anyone who has ever lived through any real northern  winters knows that. 

Also, I'm very happy to not be in the midst of a gen ad crowd (a thing I haven't done since covid became so prevalent in the US -- the few shows I've been at have all been in seated sections with masks and proof of vax both required) and to instead be at home having a hygge night with a fire in the hearth, George Winston playing by the cat's choice, tea, books (currently reading the Autobiography and Dr. Martin Luther King Jr - put it in my purse to read on MLK Day while hanging out with the 16 year old but didn't get to reading time that day so I decided I'd read it after finishing Defoe's A Journal of the Plague Year) - and a snifter of whiskey to go with my very belated dinner of chili cheese tater tot casserole. Didn't even think about starting dinner until 8:30, lol. Whoops. Sometimes ADHD be like that even for very food motivates puppy person's like me  Currently waiting the 10mins for it to set before playing. And since I haven't eaten since brunch, I have decided no whiskey for me until after I eat something. But also, tonight is a snifter of the good Redbreast whiskey sort of hygge night.