For the record:
I haven't figured out how to put the bond to sleep yet -- I've been rather busy with things for grandma and calming the... strong... personalities on my da's side of the family getting everyone back on the same page.

I do know how to sever the bond. But I don't want to do that. And not just because I don't know how it would heal. but I also just genuinely don't want that. I WANT the bond. Hell, i still want Eric same as i ever did. My refusal is for any of this toxic mess that was created by his sister over the last year  and he has made worse in his choices of the last several months. And if I can only have him if I accept or condone her bullying behaviors and  the premises on which this mess was built, then I will choose to let him go his own way this life and I'll go mine and I'll put the bond to sleep if I can so we'll both hurt less (it's still going to hurt, even if it's the hurt of an amputation, of an absence of what you thought would always be there -- I'm not lying to myself over that either) rather than leaving it to be a constant source of intense yearning and pain.

This is 100%  the fault of his sister and her behavior over the last year if not longer AND his choices in going along with her however she rationalized it or accused him of not loving her if he wouldn't stand with her on this  Hes' going to lose me, and it's ENTIRELY over this one issue and the havoc it has created. And all of it comes back to her pride and defensiveness which led her to make herself into an abusive bully and to engage in narcisisstic abuse patterns rather than face this and acknowledge her mistakes and fix this.

Any other interpretation of it is more of her bullshit rationalizing. This is what is pushing me to my course of action, this is why I chose to unfollow him and it IS Brittany's fault that this is happening to Eric and he is going through it. The fact he listened to her and has followed her rationalizing is a weakness in him, but she's the one who argued that I didn't mean precisely what I have always said in complete honesty and she is the one who has masterminded and orchestrated every step of how we got here.

And she's the one who is hurt the least by how this has all played out. I mean, karmically, she's going to have a personal hell to pay over it, and if she doesn't choose to actively work to fix what she broke for him it's going to be far worse than any hell her soul has ever yet gone through -- but actual pain over this, the bulk of of it is being felt by Eric and me hardest. Always. She's the one who made this an issue and she's the one has put him squarely in the middle of this over and over and over again.

And I will neither compromise nor condone bullying from anyone. No matter who they are related to. I don't back down over it within my own family or friends groups, I will not back down over it in his family or anyone else's. She can either destroy him by continuing with it so I leave his life or she can change and fix this rather than destroy him -- but I will never stop calling out behaviors like this for what it is. From anyone.

I will leave it an open wound in both Eric and me, even with me leaving so he won't have to see me to remind him, before I'll sever the bond between us. That is something more than I will do. Those bonds aren't mine to cut and I don't know the damage it would do to us both for the ensuiing centuries and millenia of lives.... I could just cut it.  But I refuse to do that.  I'll not cut it, even if the pain is a constant battle of active yearning being unable to be together for the rest of this life. But if I can, I'll put that bond to sleep make me unreachable to him if I can to help numb the worst of the pain. That is the kindest thing I can do, for him or me, in this situation that Brittany's ego and pride  and refusal to admit when she has been wrong has created.

And that is where it's at.

And you need to remember, the one thing that my anger doesn't burn itself out over are issues of ethics and especially issues of intentional deliberate cruelty. It's the one exception to my temper burning hot and sudden but then burning itself out completely -- when it's issues of justice and  intentional cruelty to others.   You cannot expect me to let this go or for my anger to stop burning without choosing to address this and choose to heal the damage already done and refuse to continue to behave in bullying cruel ways. That's not going to happen in this situation, I will not back down or lose my anger over this. if you want my anger at Eric and Brittany to calm down, they're going to have to apologize and fix this and prove it by changed behavior so as not to be party to bullying moving forward.