So this is really unfair of me, and I know it, but I'm rather grumphy right now about grandma texting me at 8:30am having to change out of my super cozy pjs to go take my grandma at 11 to the bank and lunch together and grocery shopping when I'd been looking forward to a slow lazy morning once munchkin dropped off before taking her to her ortho appointment at 3:30.... Then maybe book shopping before going to see Star Wars with my parents and Cath (gonna miss the Packers game unless watch it with maman afterward because she dvred it....)

And that's really mean hearted grinchy of me, I know it is.  And grandma will never know that's how I reacted....  By the time I see her I'll be a genuinely cheery ray of sunshine happy to see her and help her ball of light and love and steady calming strength for her.  (and I needed to go grocery shopping today for me anyway, like legit needed to do it.) 

But my inner two year old is throwing a massive tantrum about not wanting to change out of my pinstripe with polar bears wearing bow ties pjs. Yeah,  you read that right.  Cozy soft polar bear in bowties pg pants.

But damnit I'm keeping my Channukah socks on all day.  All day you understand!!

 In fact,  it's Channukah socks all week except for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.....

I'm gonna go make me some coffee and eat like a dozen Christmas cookies to force myself to be my sweet happy chipper self. Instead of this overtired because insufficient introvert recharge time mess of a "don'wanna" toddler throwing a tantrum about seeing people I love who actively need me and my help right now.

P. S.  This is how I get when overtired (be it physically of soul energy levels due to insufficient introvert/nature time in woods or harden.) I turn into a cranky two year old who needs a nap with a bad case of stubborn don't wannas.  Good news is shiny things,  sweets or coffee/tea, and live music can make me all smiles happiness again for 3-12 hours as a temporary patch.  (again like an overtired toddler.)  But the only REAL fix is a solid recharge time for me.... Sleep and some time without the inner noise of other humans thinking/feelinf so damn loudly and /or time with trees/stars/open water is how you fix it for reals.

P. P. S.  Since it's Packers game day AND i'm going to see the new Star Wars tonight,  I am absolutely wearing this shirt (from the kids (boys)  section of Target on St.  Patrick's Day clearance) with a sunshiney yellow skirt and my Christmas lights leggings (that clash with my Channukah socks but nobody will know because shoes.)

Because nothibg says "I am a fully functuonal adult not an overtired toddler" like a kids tee with a wookie on it says "Irish I was a Jedi" and Christmas light leggings.  😂

Time to go coffee for real.  (and now that I've changed into something else duper comfy and laughed at myself,  I'm no longer in the depths of my don't wannas. I'm actually quite happy with how it'll go.)