Do I like this solution to make me let him go under the premise he can then have whatever happiness he chooses for himself?  No.  Do I like making myself not look at him or anything he does so as not to be tempted?  No.  Is this whole thing more than a little self-destructive? Yes. Would I take a better way out if offered?  Yes.  Do I see a better way to navigate this given the choices other people have made?  No.  So will I keep doing that which I hate and causes me pain because it's the best answer I see for his sake to this mess?  Yes.  Is that stupid of me? Probably. But if I had a better answer,  I'd run with that instead! 

Find me a better way out and we'll try your way. But until then,  I'll keep on this path of self-denial and not letting him reach me and forcing myself to let him go.  Because I genuinely don't see a better course for me to choose here given the past choices and the mess they made and the options I seem to have open to me...